Sunday, January 31, 2010

INCREDIBLE DISCOVERY MADE BY FATHER

I'm really sorry, But i think i'd rather go around with no clothes and no food, than have to repay you for everything when i get older.
I'm sorry dad and mom, for using your money to survive on till now. I will definitely pay you off.
I AM SORRY I DON'T MAKE YOU HAPPY! OH AND I AM SORRY I USED YOUR PRECIOUS MONEY TO FEED ME WHEN I WAS 1. I SHOULD OF BEEN LOOKING FOR A JOB SHOUDL'T I? I COULD BARELY WALK, BUT WHOOOOO CARES THEY HIGHER PARAPLEGICS ALL THE TIME. I COULDN'T EVEN SPEAK! BUT HLF THE JOBS ARE BEHIND THE SCENES ANYWAYS! SO I'M SORRY I'M SORY I DIDN'T GET A JOB WHEN I WAS BORN SO THAT I COULD HELP YOU TAKE CARE OF ME! I'M SORRY!
SHOULD I START PAYING NOW?

Saturday, January 30, 2010

It's like an ESL student asking me to define "the"

i hate when people complain. And they never hear themselves. They come home and then complain. Or they will say something and then find the bad in it. SAY THE STUFF THAT MATTERS PEOPLE! SERIOUSLY BECAUSE NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR THE LATEST GOSSIP

Missing the future already...

I am going to miss the outdoor shower the most out of the necessities here. But of course i'm going to miss my mom more than anything.
I am going to miss the people, and all their wisdom, and the safe feeling you have. I am going to miss not having to lock your doors to the house nor the car. I am going to miss the attitude of the people in the grocery store. I am going to miss walking through town and seeing the same people. I am going to miss, missing everyone in Edmonton. I am going to miss the smell of cedar when you walk up to the front door. i am going to miss flying down the driveway on my bike. I am going to miss the dogs that have come in to my life. Second to my mom i am going to miss Bob. I love you Bob. I am going to miss the quiet and the trees. The ocean and the birds. The walks to the laundry room. The constant rain that doesn't smell like fuel. I am going to miss the warmth especially. I am going to miss my hair. I am going to miss the teachers i have met, and the people. I am going to miss a lot. But according to my future, This is a change for the better :) So i know it will be.

i hate...

the sound of a vacuum. i do not want one in my lifetime unless i have a carpet. Because i'd rather sweep than be utterly annoyed by the loud sound.

Friday, January 29, 2010

FRITZY LOVE

This is my second time going to the local theater, "The Fritz"
It's named after a cat that once lived. The theater makes oraganic popcorn with real butter--which i never understood… why make non-real butter?
Anyways, I LOVE IT i can watch a movie with out getting bored, nor neck sore. basically good karma there. And the popcorn is to die for!

I'm said to be going on a quest that is good for me next week. a good adventure, and it's a change for the better. What is good about leaving Salt Spring Island, and moving back to a cold winterous EDMONTON? i hope it's new people, new inspiration, new outlook on life. NEW ADVENTURE! BUT I CAN WAIT TILL THEN for now i must pack, and complete. then leave with the in souls of my shoes underneath me. I'm going to miss you mom, but i guess i'll see you in about 4 or 5 months, right?

FUCK YOU BELL! I EWILL GLADLY THROW MY CELLPHONE AND MY DEACTIVATION FORMS I N Y O U F A C E! Hello Koodo :)

I have found that there is no good in anger, only bad.

Oh and i forgot to mention the movies i've seen and the ones i want to see in near future…
I saw Sherlock Holmes, which was fantastic. I did n ot get bored. i finally found a movie that was fast paced, and that didn't keep me waiting till the next seen with all the dramatic mumbo jumbo. But that's just cause i'm an Aries.
I also saw, tonight, Young Victoria. Which was a love story at that. Very emotional movie, which it brings much sadness, happiness, and love in to your life. Altough i did not get much history in to the accomplishments. But yet the struggles. Very thoughtful movie. Thank you to the makers, i'm glad i saw it!


Teenage with a story...

that i cannot say aloud.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

When the creator exists

When you are about to be filled with anger towards someone, ask a question instead.

Why are the clouds pink?

You know whoever we become, what ever we do, how ever we do, where ever we go, what ever inspiration, what ever the day! WE WILL ALWAYS WONDER WHAT OTHER PEOPLE ARE THINKING OF US! we will stop sometime in a day, and ponder what other people are seeing as they look at you. that's when you get self conscience. I'm saying it's normal, i'm saying you cant be completely confident with yourself. I'm plainly saying THINK ABOUT IT! don't feel like you are shrinking into a "pea", always come out of it stronger! that's what i'm saying, COME OUT OF IT STRONGER!

I cut all my hair off, because i need to stop thinking so much of what everybody is thinking and more about who i am. We all do. We can sit in a coffee shop and wonder what "category" you fall in to when somebody looks at you. Or we can think about what we are going to do after we leave the place, to make that day, THAT much better. We can think about our actions, and our words towards people rather what they are seeing. Because if you are as happy and interactive with someone's thoughts, then it surpasses what you looked like in the first place. FOCUS PEOPLE ON YOUR KINDNESS AND HUMBLE THOUGHTS. LOVE YOUR BODY AND LOVE YOURSELF!

I don't like having bad breath after coffee. You know a thought just came to me… We should act as if awe would by our selves. Don't hold back because people have thoughts of you. if they can 'hate' then you wouldn't be friends with them anyways. they are negative, and not worthy, they need to change. taste like baby poo… :/

i would make a youtube video, but is it worth the negative AND the positive comments?

Ipad is stupid, but inventive that's for sure!


Wednesday, January 27, 2010

OVER YONDER


I
LET
IT
ALL
GO!
FEEEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR BRAIN!

Earthquakes and Havic

So apparently there is supposed to be an earthquake at the olimpics. It could be a class 9! all i'm saying is that it could be, let alone a class 7, 5, or 3 ITS STILL BAD! hmm…
What'd yeah say to a threesome EH?
The second i get home, I will be purchasing Froot loops. I'm salivating. This is unfortunate that i have to wait… maybe i'll get some tomorrow… who knows? but hell NOTHING CAN MAKE UP FOR FROOT LOOPS OTHER THEN THE ORIGINAL!
uuuurrrrgggggghh!
May we say words that are meaningful, and smile when we are happy.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Tomorrow is a new day...

I may go to Victoria tomorrow, make a hair appt. and go to american apparel to get that thing i wanted! It will definitely be an adventure, going on the ferry then figuring out bus routes and such, all with a time span.
My mom is sad that i'm leaving i can tell in her tone of voice, it breaks my heart. i'm going to miss her!

FUCK THAT

I NEEED TO GET OUT
When i get home
GARGLE GARGLE GARGLE

There's a time ana place for that


Sandwiches for dinner, sandwiches for breakfast, SANDWICHES FOR LIFE! but damn are they good!
the cat scratched my pinky finger and it's been feeling all swollen and red for the past two days… i wonder what's up with it?
WEARING SHORTS!
I had a shower with the sun beaming on my face :) made me smile…. I WANT A TAN!
genesha will guide me.
Living with my yetunde (my sister) now. :D
JOB JOB JOB JOB JOB HUNNNNNT! :s
SWIMMING IS MY DREAM AT THE MOMENT!
drawing is in the past, i need to explore my athletic side now. HELLO BASKETBALL GOODBYE PAINT!
I will be home on Monday. DITTCCCH!

Monday, January 25, 2010

BLIND PEOPLE

Why would you say that father? i felt i was asking too much, when i did. I also thought that you would consider that your daughter, would actually like to live with you. DO I HAVE TO PAY YOU FOR YOUR HAPPINESS TOWARDS ME!? DO I HAVE TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING IN RETURN FOR LOVE!? I AM SORRY IF I DO NOT MAKE YOU HAPPY! BECAUSE YOU DON'T MAKE ME HAPPY EITHER!

Unconditional Love

Someone once asked me if i hated one of my parents, or just couldn't stand one of them. I replied with that i loved my parents, and even all the bullshit they say, i love too many things about them to hate them completely. But i can safely say that my dad is emotionally incompatible, and as much as i want to help him, and make him happier; he is too insanely angry about life and everything it withholds. Dad, i wish i could help you, but you died before you even got a chance.
I will live with you for a while, but the second i get a chance to move out, i will. I will never have anything to do with you, except to socialize with. Because i have learn't not to trust you, and to not believe in you.
I hate to say such harsh words, but it's how i feel, can't hide from that.

Bank account balances depress us no matter what

I realized that mothers give their lives to their children. Until i know what it feels like to have a child, i guess i will never understand. When you make all your pictures on the internet of your children, that's when you know they have given everything to these youth. WHERE HAVE "YOU" GONE AS A PERSON?! You may of had a child at 20, or 16, or 40, BUT YOU SHOULD NEVER END YOUR LIFE FOR THEM! Maybe i don't understand what a mother daughter/son relationship withholds. But there are some mothers who are so proud of their children, that their blogs are all about them, the profile pictures are them; frankly i want to commend you on your love for them, but i want to see you, and when your children grow up and get a blog, we will hear about them.

it is raining.

We hiked up Mt.Maxwell with my sister Katie, and my mom yesterday. In the rain.

i am going to cut my hair off. and get my nose pierced this week. Big week of 'letting go' i'd say.

I will be back to Edmonton in a week. Am i excited "no. Am i happy, "i'm not sure".

I think i have truly excepted myself and my body, at least i am starting to. And i love myself.